Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Sexy Half Assed 3rd Place Duo
I pulled 3rd overall in duo even though we took long breaks, drank
whisky and generally hung out as opposed to letting it all hang out.
That said, we did turn them over hard when we were out on course.
Speaking, of the course, tight twisting with flow, teeter-totter,
power climbs including a long lose rocky climb that I never even tried
to clean.
"Here's to low expectations and low turnouts." - Johnny
Friday, May 16, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Assorted Snobbery: "Who's H.L. Mencken?"
Several years ago, I got a "real job." I stopped working at BGI and entered the world of start-up companies at what was then known as IIRC, International Internet Recruiting Consultants. In pretty short order, I was working with companies like Dell, Kinkos and Coors, managing their accounts and generally making a successful nuisance of myself. Fast-forward a year and I made the mistake of taking a role in the sales department, thinking I could repeat the success I'd seen in my old position.
Yeah... not so much.
I struggled, didn't get any direction and, despite working my ass off, got nowhere. So, as I tend to do, I got pissed. Not at anyone in particular, just angry I was failing and, seeking a bit of inspiration, put the following quote from H.L. Mencken on my machine as a screensaver just before I left for some time off:
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.
In my mind, I'd come back to work and, in simple terms, start kicking ass. Why I believed that, I have no idea, but that was my thought process.
As you can guess, my arrival back wasn't quite what I expected. I noticed the screensaver was gone, my desk was a bit cleaner than usual, and that feeling of "someone has been jacking with my things" was in the air.
However, no one said a word to me. Nothing. I finally asked my friend Scott, who had also come from BGI, if he knew what the story was. His response went a little something like this.
"Yeah, someone read that on your machine and it freaked them out. They were acting like they thought you might come in and go postal on everyone. It was pathetic. I tried to say that they had no idea what it meant and that they were acting ridiculous, but they didn't listen. Then they deleted it. I can't believe they haven't said anything to you."
A couple of my other coworkers relayed basically the same line, which just left me a little dumbfounded. "So, people are afraid I'm the guy that will snap but don't have the balls to say anything to me about it? Nice."
Near the end of the day, I asked one of our C-level execs about it, because I still couldn't believe no one had addressed it with me. As a former, HR executive, I guess his answer shouldn't have surprised me.
"It made some people uncomfortable, so we felt it best to erase it."
"And that's it?"
"That's it. By the way, who's H.L. Mencken?"
It was so anticlimatic that I felt a little lost. Not once did any coworker who expressed concern over the quote talk to me about it, which is what really pissed me off about the whole thing. I turned the other cheek for a while, let my disdain show a little more and began the search for other work not long after.
I've also learned more from reading H.L. Mencken than I ever did at that job.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Happy Monday

Snappy Caps Note:
Some new caps were listed over the weekend. Please check them out.
And, don't forget, custom caps are always an option and come almost as fast as a ready-made one.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Down In A Hole
There is a lot to look forward to this month. First and foremost, Team "Enduring the Screw" is set to take on the 12hrs of Sexy Night this coming weekend. Johnny listed our sponsors as War Axe and Maker's Mark. Slow lap drinks? Every lap drinks is more likely.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Finding Escape Routes
Monday, May 05, 2008
Show Off
It's a good thing War Axe forks will be hitting the trail soon, Mrs. Snob's making us look bad.
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Swanson XC #2: "Brandon, Is that You?"
Saturday, May 03, 2008
70 Miles and Clouds of Dust
Friday, May 02, 2008
Someone Is "Out of Control"
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
TI V4, the Race: As Expected, Yet Disappointed
That night, last year's 'go light' freeze at night was abandoned for a more expedition style plan. The weather, which has been pretty well documented, looked like it would be hell throughout the race and it was the last leg that concerned me most. With temps forecast around 30 degrees and calls for a wintery mix, not to mention only a couple of pass-thru towns with stores along the way, I decided to carry more early so I would have it at the end. Mrs. Snob sewed me a messenger bag for the task and I loaded it with extra clothes, a bit of food, meds and bottles. Enough to go through towns with either short stops or without stopping at all.
At the start line, I remained cautiously optimistic. My bag wasn't terribly heavy and my cough was nowhere to be seen. As G-Ted lead us off of Ice Cave road and into the first climb, I watched MG and Eric climb up the road into toward the lead group and I soon found myself in a second group which included Corey, Constantine, Aris, Scott Cole, Dennis Grelk, eventual fourth place finisher Charles Parsons and a few others.
During the first 50 miles, I felt like my usual self, climbing well and feeling like a working part of the group. Somewhere shortly afterward, it was as if the volume dial was slowly getting turned down on my riding. Like an early season ride when your fitness isn't quite up for a long one, I was fading.
9... 8... 7...
Along the way, I had some nice, albeit short, conversations with several in our group. Aris had given his Snappy Cap to his girlfriend because it was one of the few cycling caps she had seen that was 'cool.' Scott was riding with thoughts of a friend who is fighting cancer for the second time. Corey and I often joked and tried to remember to have a good time. (Up one hill in particular, Corey, Constantine and I were climbing near each other and as Corey spun, Constantine and I were fighting the single speed fight so I yelled, "Man, I love pedalling squares!" in my best radio voice. I am a dork.) All of this had me enjoying myself despite numb hands, fading energy and the thought that I would soon be off of the back solo.
6... 5... 4...
For a while, I became accordian man. I would fall away from the group slowly, then meet the group at a pass-thru town. Since I didn't have to do anything but get water, I was leaving with the same group, then fading again. Back and forth. Forth and back. Luckily for me, our group also missed the flags to get around the first flooded road because it helped Matt Wills and Jeff catch us more quickly. I was then able to ride with MW for about 20 miles with Jeff doing his own accordian work with the two of us. (At some point, MW and I passed a dead raccoon that was on the roof of a barn. I've seen a lot of dead raccoons, but none several days old on a hot tin roof.) However, we all faded at different rates and around the 65 mile mark, I was riding solo and thinking about how I wanted to handle the rest of the race. I was feeling pretty low, but told myself I had planned on this so it was time for a one step at a time attitude.
Then I hit Dove Rd. (Fuck you, Dove Rd. Fuck you and the gravel that rests on you.) Dove Rd. started off nicely enough with a small bridge over a little creek. Dove Rd. then jacks up at a pretty sharp incline and makes you work. I got maybe halfway up it and started walking. It felt a little like failure but I couldn't ride it so there was nothing else left. After another minute or so, I heard noise from behind and it was a group with Corey, Charles, MG, Scott and Constantine.
"Why in hell are you guys behind me?"
"We stopped to get lunch." Corey replied. That was the heat seeker. Three weeks of disappointment and stress over getting sick before TI burned through me as that group passed, everyone looking strong as they went. As arrogant and selfish as it sounds, I felt like that was my group to be in and so disappointed I wasn't there and walking my bike. "I wanted to put a bullet in the head of every panda that wouldn't fuck to save it species."
3... 2... 1...
I carried on from there just grinding away. At some point, my feet also started throbbing as they did last year and my frustrations grew. (I also resolved at this point to get custom shoes, but that story is for another post.) Jonn and Justin, our support team, pulled up next to me at one point and asked how I was doing. "I'm fucked!!" was my angry response. Jonn's facial expression told me he didn't know what to do with my response so I moved on.
"Have you talked to Jeff?"
"Avey? No, why would I..."
"NO! Bonsall!! How's he doing?"
"Oh... we just passed him. He's not too far behind you."
...2 ...3 ...4
And with that, I felt a little better. With each climb, I keep looking back for Jeff. Dennis came by during this time, but he was riding very much in his own head and it seemed best to let him keep rocking, so I looked for Jeff. As I topped out at a very long hill, I saw just come around a curve at the bottom. Jeff could have taken a year to get up that hill and I would have waited for him. He slugged it out like a machine though and soon stood next to me.
I dug into my messenger, pulled out a Starbuck's Daybreak cookie and held it up to Jeff.
"I have two questions for you. One, do you want to share this cookie. Two, would you mind my company to the checkpoint?" Luckily for me, Jeff answered 'yes' to both.
...5 ...6 ...7
Jeff and I slugged our way to the finish like guys out for a ride on Sunday, but guys riding with purpose. I enjoyed that time a lot. We made the cutoff with about five minutes to spare. My feet were getting worse and I had already decided I was done. There was another moment when I thought of grabbing Constantine, MG and Jeff and going for it, but it was quickly quelled by thoughts of 9 Mile being ruined by my feet last year (and Showen's IM to me about that very fact on Thursday).
I took my shoes off, snuck off to have a coughing fit and pulled out another cookie to share with MG. Eric, MW and Corey had gone back out and it was time to grab the pom-poms to go super fan. We still had a long night ahead of us....
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Corey Will Finish Fifth
shortened due to washed out roads and, baring disaster, he'll be the
fifth and final rider to finish TI V.4.
Viva la Cornbread!!
Corey Pushes On
hour of reovery, he decided to 'try.' We decided he would go, but
that we would wait behind, then go check on him after about 30
minutes. Two huge thumbs up later, he was cranking it toward CP2 and
looking strong.
I love that guy.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Prep
Last year I arrived in Iowa and found I had forgotten a couple of key clothing items for the race. Genius. So, like Santa making his list and checking it twice, I've been Mr. Paranoid tonight trying to make sure I am not taking plastic wrap for bananas from a Casey's in the middle of the night to try to stay warm in V.4. On the plus side, my War Axe fleece knickers arrived and are making the trip. They're so comfy I may order a pair san chamois for pajamas.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Sunday, April 20, 2008
"I Guess I Can Always Just Stop"
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Doomstruck Craziness
Having not ridden in two weeks and having some coughing spells fit for Val Kilmer in Tombstone, I was a bit nervous about how I'd feel. After twenty minutes of light coughing and even lighter riding, I hit some gravel north of town and promptly had a couple of mutts nipping at my heels on an slight uphill. After outstretching the pups I expected a hacking spell, but found I was fine to keep cranking on up the hill. Strangely, after I topped out and was soft-pedalling down the other side, the cough kicked in and, after reaching a level which included gagging, finally calmed down as I started up a slight rise again. WTF?
Shortly after, my attention turned to my left pedal, which was clicking loudly combined with the fact it felt like I had a cleat loose. Add in that my front tire seemed to be slowly leaking and I was left feeling exasperated and frustrated. Mainly, due to my health. The mechanical stuff was just icing.
I stopped to find a broken pedal (4th pair down) and a tearing sidewall. Just what the doctor ordered. Luckily, I just limped the whole thing home. Unluckily, two and a half hours left me feeling like I had gone six. So, of course, I said 'fuck it' and did some yard work. Spring has sprung.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Always Returned with Scars to Show
Visited my friendly Dr. So-And-So today and walked away with a prescription and little to no positive vibes regarding that short little race next weekend. I'm just rolling with the punches. We'll call it "The Big Taper."
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
"No One Wants to See That."
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Message In A 40oz Bottle: Elk's 'Rock For Light' Rule
And I quote:
Rock For Light Rule: Finally, go get yourself a copy of the classic Bad Brains album, Rock for Light. Throw it in your CD player, turn the volume to 11, and simultaneously hit the Play and Repeat options. Play it 'til your ears bleed or your neighbors call the cops, which ever comes first. If you're not familiar with the lyrics, keep your ear tuned to the wisdom of HR and you'll notice the concept of PMA, or Positive Mental Attitude, is featured prominently throughout. "Gotta, gotta, gotta, keep that P-M-A!" This has been my mantra on more than one occasion while sick or hurt, and sometimes the enlightenment that comes from reciting this mantra takes form of a laser sharp focus on a goal one, three, or six months down the road.
I don't fancy myself as the Philosopher King of South Philly, but I have a very strong belief in the power of positive thinking and attitude when it comes to overcoming health challenges. Being sick as the race season commences is a real buzz killer and the disappointment that comes along with it is genuine. But in the same regard, it is easy to visualize a return good health and success looming on the not so distant horizon. "Gotta, gotta, gotta, keep that P-M-A!" Goals don't always have to mean crossing the finish line first.
End Quote.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Down and Out
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Into the Wolf's Den
We arrived at the lake, went through the usual pre-race nonsense and decided to do a lap or two to warm-up. It didn't take long for us all to agree that the course seems to have a bad rep. for no reason. In fact, we discussed a few times how it they would let a motorbike on the course for a lap or two, the harsh ride of the newly cut trails would be 'primo.' I doubt that's THOR approved, but it is all that's needed.
As we went through the single speed call up, the promoter called out "SkiD Cronin," which gave us all a good laugh. "Well, I do tend to grab too much brake." I joked as I raised my hand with a grin. Alter-Nate was sitting beside me and we continued to banter back and for until the word 'GO.'
I generally feel pretty clueless when it comes to deciding how hard to go at the start of an XC race. Considering I tend to start slowly in long events anyway, I decided to push it a bit out of my comfort zone but stay away from popping right away. With the start an uphill gravel road climb until you reached the single track, I knew it would at least give me an open view of everyone else so I could judge where I was sitting.
Near the top, Sam and Alter-Nate were at the front with a Bike Masters rider about 15 yards in front of me. I looked around and realized I had gapped everyone else by about that same distance. As we hit the single track, I simply worked hard and hoped to see how things were sitting once I popped into a more open area of the course. About a third of the way through the first lap, I realized I was losing ground on the leaders and keeping the same gap on the group of four behind me. I then did something I had never done in an XC race. I used a tactic and slowed slightly so the group of four would catch me.
The course consisted of many short climbs and, in the woods, several power sucking sections of damp earth. The damp sections actually pulled more energy than many of the dry steeper climbs and, as I slide into the back of the bunch that had caught me, wondered how wise I was really being in deciding to ride with the bunch.
I spent most of the second lap trying to sort out who in the group was stronger in what sections of the course I decided that I may have been digging my own grave by having that many people to pass. I also spent time chatting with Brandon which was great in that it made the race more fun and gave me some hope that my penchant for endurance might help me at the end of the race. (Thanks again, B.)
Near the end of lap two, I was able to use some of the climbs to slide forward and, early in the last lap, I had only one Bike Masters rider left in front of me. I stayed behind him for a while as he and I both seemed to be putting time into most of the other riders and then I began to think I wouldn't be able to pass him. As we entered the last muddy section of single track, he got several seconds in front of me and I thought I was screwed. However, during the last open switchback climbing section, I got to his wheel and, to my surprise, he waved me by. With only one last short climb to go I simply tried to finish strongly, and sort out how I was feeling.
I chatted with several of our 'gang of four' post race. Everyone was classy and in good spirits. We shared a little misery regarding the mud which wore us down and the way the course was on its way to being really nice. It just takes a bit more traffic.
Sam and Alter-Nate took second and third in SS respectively and Nate rode to third in the Expert open on a single speed. Jesse P. also took top honors in his age group and was 3rd overall. Nice day for War Axe. Nice day for Lincoln.
With our work done, we stopped at "The Wolf's Den" for dinner. Classic small town dinner/bar combo. As the first cyclists in the place, we got a lot of looks for the locals who sat at two large round tables playing cards.
We took tables near the restrooms which were labelled "Pointers" and "Setters." The portions were huge (particularly the burgers) and the service was friendly as we huge for a couple of hours. As we left, the race promotor, Jon Downey (who put on a really well done event) asked Sam and I how he could get a War Axe cap. After a small pause Sam offered, "You can have the one off of my head if you don't mind washing it." Seconds later, the War Axe virus had spread a little further and we were on our way home.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Friday, April 04, 2008
Assorted Snobbery: The Colbert Bump
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Channel Neil Cassady?
Enjoy it, indeed.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Tired
I guess it's safe to say the season is here. MG already put Lincoln on the board and with a local XC race this weekend and Corey, Kevin Burke and I heading to Ouachita, we're all about to get busy in a hurry.
For now though, I'm off to play a game of Sorry with the crew. Bikes can wait.
















































